Haute Like Couture


April 10,2014 » Permalink
Tagged as: personal

He smelled like Sunday mornings, Bon Iver and Macallan 18.

I don’t sleep much.

I wake up constantly for periods ranging between thirty minutes and a few hours.

It has been this way since I can remember;

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April 10,2014 » Permalink
Tagged as: personal

texturism:

in effect, the cost of being who you are is that you can’t possibly meet everyone’s expectations, and so, there will inevitably, be external conflict to deal with - the friction of being visible.

still, the cost of not being who you are is that while you are busy pleasuring everyone around you, a precious part of you is dying inside; in this case, there will be internal conflict to deal with – the friction of being invisible.

- mark nepo | via mystic mama [emphasis mine]

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April 10,2014 » Permalink

Everything.

       Zuhair Murad Pre-Fall 2014

Ideal attire for crashing a cocktail party.

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April 3,2014 » Permalink
Tagged as: personal

Haute Like Couture

Anonymous asked: So he broke up with you to go on the show?

Sort of.

This is where things get complicated.

We broke up twice, I guess.

When he initially heard he had been chosen, he presented the news to me as just that: news. He did not give any indication about a decision. I stupidly told him to do it which I can only assume he understood as an implication that I was not serious about our relationship because if the person you are dating encourages you to go on a TV show about finding love with someobody else, well, what else is there to think?

I was a coward.

So, when he broke it off in a very ungentlemanly fashion, I was pissed above all else by what he had done and the missing him did not really settle in for a bit.

A week later I was less angry, more sad. And confused. So, I asked questions. He answered. I am sitting on his couch, as far as possible from him, wondering how we got to that place because there we are, two people who clearly like each other being forced apart by one of the most heinous shows on television. We (spoiler alert this was: STUPID STUPID STUPID) agreed to get back together for the two weeks that remained before filming.

How do you continue something with a definitive end date?

YOU DON’T.

And now I am focused on acquiring killer abs.

And he is making out with Andi Dorfman somewhere in Europe.

So, I guess, yeah, he broke up with me to go on the show,.

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April 3,2014 » Permalink
Tagged as: personal

Haute Like Couture

Anonymous asked: Are you going to tell us which one he is so we can watch and laugh at him with you?

I have received a number of inquiries along the lines of this re: suitor turned Reality TV Star. I have pangs of regret for even naming the show but what the fuck ever.

While he deserves endless shit for going on The Bachelorette (because really, you have to be un.hinged), the truth is that he made me laugh and feel and think in ways I had forgotten I could. And he made a shitty choice and then proceeded to make even shittier choices about that choice but, ultimately, it was his mistake choice to make.  I don’t even want to laugh at him; he did what he wanted, it is more than I can say for myself.

So, no, probably not…

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April 2,2014 » Permalink
Tagged as: personal

Getting over it, letting go and moving on.

The truth is I don’t know how to let go.

It is why I am so devastatingly careful about who I hold on to to begin with.

We made a mess of things

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March 21,2014 » Permalink
Tagged as: perfectly simple

Perfectly simple,

simply perfect.

image

       Kendall Jenner // March 21

Too damn good.

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